Healing comes from taking responsibility…
What if, instead of feeling powerless to emotional triggers, we saw them as opportunities for growth? What if instead of feeling victimised by what someone has said or done, we used this insight to notice our reaction and get curious about it?
There’s learning in everything and I guess the choice (while it often doesn’t feel like a choice when we’re deep in emotional reactivity!) is if we allow ourselves to be steamrolled by it or instead, use it as a way to learn and expand.
Whenever these triggers show up, just get quiet for a moment and ask…..
o What exactly is being triggered?
o Is it really about this situation here and now or has a deeper wound been accessed?
o What thoughts or beliefs are going through our minds (even subconsciously) about our experience?
o If we could speak to the wiser, older self we’ll be in years to come, what advice would they give us about our experience now?
o What’s the lesson that we’re being called to look at?
o What area of potential growth is being illuminated for us to see?
I believe we give so much of our power away by feeling victimised by challenges – I know this has personally been a huge part of my own growth so far. But for sure what I’ve noticed is that each time I stop and get up close and present with my emotional reactivity, I soften that sensation of powerless and actually heal a little part of my being that felt small and overwhelmed by something or someone ‘out there’.
Facing challenges head on with wisdom, curiosity and presence is a beautiful starting point for reclaiming power that people and painful situations may have taken from us in the past.
“Most people use their energy attempting to rearrange circumstances that trigger painful emotions. Changing external circumstances will not change your rigid patterns of emotional response. That requires looking at the patterns themselves.”
— Gary Zuka